FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Common questions answered
Screen Time
It depends on their age and whether it’s fun or functional screen time
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Spending too much time in front of a screen means losing out on other activities and
experiences which are important to the development of your child. Too much screen time has proven detrimental impacts on young brains, eyes, bodies and mental health.
We like to distinguish between educational (or functional) and entertaining (fun) screen time. Screen time that combines both is first prize – such as MineCraft, brain games, word puzzles etc
Pornography & Violence
Online porn is hard-core and is being classified as the new drug. It is highly addictive and the younger the exposure, the greater the addiction. The aggressive/ submissive and violent theme of online porn significantly affects how young, developing minds view and approach intimate relationships later in life.
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Take a deep breath, read our blog to prep, and then sit down and talk to them. Use parental filters to prevent access to inappropriate adult websites, and to limit social media apps and games, which are often the initial source of exposure.
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Parents can get very defensive around accepting that their child exposed yours to
pornography. Remember that it was going to happen regardless of how it happened. Give yourself space to calm down before talking with the other parent, ideally in-person, and follow our guidelines in our blog.
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Gaming
Settings for games can be changed to protect the identity and location of your kids, to keep them safer.
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App and game developers use similar persuasive technology techniques to those used by the gambling industry, to make games irresistible, compulsive and hard to stop.
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Just like any professional sport, to be an eSport athlete you must show both Discipline and Evidence. Use their passion to drive them to build discipline (sticking to agreements) and competing in appropriate competitions to prove they have what it takes.
Social Media
Teens love social media but they need your guidance and inputs as it can affect their self-worth, confidence and general mental health. Most of the popular social media platforms like Instagram, SnapChat and TikTok, are real-age rated 16+.
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Settings for apps can be changed to protect the identity and location of your kids, to keep them safer.
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App and game developers use similar persuasive technology techniques to those used by the gambling industry, to make apps irresistible, compulsive and hard to stop. If you child’s Social Media use is negatively impacting their studies, sleep or relationships, talk to them about it.
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Filters & Limits
A: Try to wait as long as you can, to let your child use a smartphone. Set it up from the start with parental filters, and apply the “loan rather than own” principle, so that you can manage and control it. A cell phone contract is an excellent way to agree the rules of use and consequences of misuse.
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A: Make a Family Digital Alliance and agree how, when and where screens are used. Use screen time apps and/or WiFi routers to help guide and develop your family’s good digital habits.
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A: ScreenTime (iOs) and Family Link (Android) are a good start, but installing parental control filters on devices and WiFi are best.
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Settings
Tech companies monitor our likes and dislikes through every click we make, and use our data to channel our preferences, beliefs and opinions, and market products to us. Changing the default settings helps protect your online privacy.
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Default settings for phones, tablets, computers and gaming consoles can all be reset to protect data security and location.
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Start with your own phone, change your notification settings to stop your phones apps from contacting you for unnecessary reasons. Do you really need to know that you just got a new LinkedIn request?
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Cyberbullying
Cyberbullying is prevalent on social media and online games, make it a habit of asking your child about their 'Digital Day' to keep lines of communication open about their online world. If they tell you they are being Cyberbullied, treat it as if it were in person bullying, contact the bullys parent, escalate to a teacher if need be, and be sure to take a screenshot the bullying so you can have a discussion about it.
Congratulate your child on speaking up. Teach your child to be a Cyber Superhero: an Upstander rather than a Bystander.
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An Upstander is someone who speaks up in support of a victim of cyberbullying. A Bystander takes the easier route of avoiding the conflict they are observers too.
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Getting your child to open up to you requires consistently asking them about what is going for them, do it daily, and don’t be specific about the bullying, when they feel more
comfortable, they will open up. Also, institute a new rule that all phones are out of
bedrooms at night, as this is when most cyberbullying occurs.
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Stranger Danger
If you wouldn’t open your front door to strangers and let them play in your child’s room, monitor who they are talking to online.
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Take screenshots of messages, save images or videos and report it immediately to the child protection authority in your jurisdiction!
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Unless you have made sure that your child can only talk with certain users who you have approved are their friends, or you have set up a private chat channel, you have to assume they are open to being contacted by unsupervised adults, which is a risk that is not worth taking.
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5 STAR REVIEWS
What Our Customers Say
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Real, practical guidance that can save us a lot of damage and drama. A stitch in time n all. Thanks Josh! 
Linda Wilson
December 14, 2020 - Josh and his team bring significant experience, best practice and the latest tech to the digital wellness space. Our learnings through Be In Touch really emphasize the dire need for all parents to step into a space or knowing how to manage your child’s online journey always supporting healthy usage. I highly recommend working with Josh
Misha Teasdale
December 14, 2020 - deeply thoughtful ideas to help parents with meaningful control over the acess to social media for their children.
TimRobin Farina
December 10, 2020 - The solution could not be more relevant.
Arno Van Der Walt
December 15, 2020 - Simple, insightful - what all busy parents need
Rmd Gammatec
December 10, 2020 - Be in Touch is an absolute invaluable initiative and resource for parents and their children, and even for grandparents like myself, as we navigate this ever growing digital landscape. The digital connected world has such incredible value, but also many challenges, as not only we are being exposed to very powerful negative agendas over the web, but also the danger of devices being the new addiction. Josh and team, thanks so much for coming form a deep values-based motivation to support us in this way.
Tertia Smit
December 17, 2020 - Very important for all families with young children, tweens and teens!
Susan Tasker
December 10, 2020 - An amazing organization made up of an amazing team! Extremely proud to be associated with BIT!
Russell Pengelly
December 14, 2020
Parental controls are about monitoring not spying. Protecting, guiding and mentoring our kids as they go online, is an absolutely essential part of our job as parents in today’s digital world.
Controls that give you alerts about what you need to guide your kids on, as well as giving you insights into what their passions and interests are, helps to build bridges for amazing connections between parents and their kids!
Chat to us about what would work for YOUR family [email protected]
#parentalcontrols #bethere #beintouch
Cyberbullying – mercilessly easy with devastating consequences. We need superheros more than ever before. We need those brave characters who step forward when they see wrong, and step up to set it right. Who are not afraid to speak up when someone needs to do so. Who can make a big impact to someone else’s life, with a small action. We call them UPSTANDERS. They are our cyber superheros.
An upstander can make all the difference to stopping cyberbullying quickly. We can teach and empower our kids to play an important role in protecting each other, by choosing to be an upstander rather than a bystander. How could they react when they observe cyberbullying?
Don’t laugh, encourage the bully or participate
Don’t become an “audience” for the bully, even the silent kind
Support the person being cyberbullied with a kind, caring, or complimentary message
Include the victim in some of your online activities
Reach out to offer the cyberbully some kindness - they probably need it more than you think!
And always offload to an adult.
#stopcyberbullying #bekind #beanupstander
Kids don't come with a parenting manual! When it comes to setting our own family rules around devices and going online safely, we try to keep in mind these easy 8 steps to digital parenting.👣
Have you got any tried and tested tips to share? We'd love to hear them!👊
#digitalparenting #8steps
Yes, if only life was that easy, my dear teen! 😀
#wishfulthinking
Credit: @jerrykcartoons
As the protests roll out through South Africa, your kids will be getting alerts, updates, tweets, posts, and breaking news directly to their phones. No matter how old they are, they may feel worried, frightened, angry, or even guilty. So, besides banning all devices, what can you do as a parent to help your kids deal with all this information?
Common Sense Media has these great suggestions:
⏩ For the family -
🔹Consider your own reactions. Your kids will look to the way you handle the news to determine their own approach. If you stay calm and rational, they will, too.
🔹Take action. Depending on the issue and kids' ages, families can find ways to help those affected by the news.
⏩ For kids under 7 -
🔹Keep the news away. Turn off the TV and radio news when they are in range.
🔹Talk about how you will keep your family safe. Try not to minimize or discount their concerns and fears, but reassure them by explaining all the protective measures that exist to keep them safe.
🔹Be together. Though it's important to listen and not belittle their fears, distraction and physical comfort can go a long way.
⏩ For kids 8–12 -
🔹Carefully consider your child's maturity and temperament. Many kids can handle a discussion of threatening events, but if your kids tend toward the sensitive side, be sure to keep them away from the TV news; repetitive images and stories can make dangers appear greater, more prevalent, and closer to home.
🔹Be available for questions and conversation. At this age, many kids will see the morality of events in stark black-and-white terms and are in the process of developing their moral beliefs.
🔹Talk about, and filter, news coverage. If you let your kids use the Internet, go online with them. Monitor where your kids are going online.
⏩ For teens -
🔹Check in. Since, in many instances, teens will have absorbed the news independently of you, talking with them can offer great insights into their developing politics and their senses of justice and morality.
🔹Let teens express themselves. Many teens will feel passionately about events. Try to address their concerns without dismissing or minimizing them.
@commonsenseorg
Privacy Protection or Secrecy Safeguarding?
WhatsApp already allows users to send messages that automatically delete themselves after seven days, and is now launching their new feature “View Once”, mimicking Snapchat’s disappearing photos and videos. The recipient will be able to view the photo or video only once, before the message self-destructs. It's good to keep in mind that the image will remain on the screen as long as it is not closed. During this time, the recipient can take a screenshot of the image, and WhatsApp will not notify the user because, unlike apps like Snapchat, there is no method used to detect screenshots implemented inside the app. Similarly, users can also record the image using another camera while the image is open.
Will WhatsApp now become the new easy-access cyberbullying, sexting and porn sharing app for tweens and teens? 🥺
#safersocialmedia #keepkidssafe
If Gen Z and Gen A could redefine Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs… 😆
#priorities #basicneeds
Yoga, meditation, mindfulness, channeling my inner zen...
#gotthis💪
How did you teach your kids to ride a bike?
For sure, parenting today is much harder than the good old days!
Tech is great, we all love it. A lot! But kids, tweens and teens are even more powerless than us to resist the lure.
Our job as parents, is help them learn how to go online - safely, sanely.
Parental controls are priceless for peace of mind!
#keepkidssafeonline
#protectkids #protectdevices
You've got enough on your plate, let us help you figure it out!
[email protected]
#parentalcontrolsareamust #peaceofmind
I'm all about making tech work for ME!
#familydigitalhealth
Credit: @jerrykcartoons
Keeping our kids safer online is a global priority and we're all in this together! Josh was asked by @necessities4children to share his experiences about struggling with online and offline compulsions to youth in Florida:
"Sincere thanks for taking time to speak and inspire with your story! You ROCK and the feedback so far is amazing. It’s so inspiring and necessary for youth; with your vulnerability, honesty and real life application."
Drop us a message if you'd like Josh to share his story with YOUR school, to inspire kids to SHARE back what they are really seeing, doing and feeling online👇
[email protected]
#keepkidssafeonline #onlineoffline
Join @salvazioneschool @getyoti and Be in Touch in helping to protect our youth as they go online, with better age verification measures. We need photos of under 13's to train up the technology to do this. AND every photo uploaded using this link will earn R20 towards much needed fundraising for Salvazione School!
Please use this link and give us a photo of your child 🙏 It's quick, secure and POPI Act compliant!
https://share2protect.yoti.com/beintouch
#share2protect #yoti #ageverification #ageestimation
It’s an endless task these days, protecting our kids when they go online, from seeing things and talking to people that they shouldn’t.
Imagine a world where proper online age verification for under 13’s exists. It is a reality, but we need YOUR help!
Be In Touch, FEDSAS and Media Monitoring Africa are supporting better protection for kids going online. We’re helping Yoti to run the #share2protect campaign, to gather 50 000 photos to train age estimation technology.
It is a quick process, safe, secure and POPI compliant.
Get your school signed up today and share in the amazing rewards on offer, while doing your bit to keep all of our kids safer online!
Send an email to [email protected], to get a full campaign launch pack.
#share2protect
@getyoti @fedsas @webrangersza
An app where teens get to curate each other’s profile…. ummm, OK?? Or not?
POPARAZZI is the new photo sharing platform “where your friends are your paparazzi and you are theirs”. Selfie mode is disabled, so you can only take photos of your friends, and there are no features like cropping, captions or filters! It’s raw, unedited life, as caught in the moment.
Chat to your teens about owning their own profile - and reputation! Ask them how they would manage photos that show them in a compromising way, and what their digital footprint might look like if their friends get to direct the direction it takes.
#beintouch #beintheknow
Let's all make it our business!
#childprotectionweek2021
Referencing Hannah Baker, a teenager whose suicide is the central story of the Netflix show, 13 Reasons Why, the Baker Act TikTok Challenge involves teens telling how they have tried to or want to commit suicide, what works and what doesn’t.
If your kids are on TikTok, PLEASE talk to them! We know this is a fine line between sparking curiosity and helping your teen deal with something they might stumble onto online.
Ask them these questions:
*Do you know anyone who's threatened to hurt or kill themselves?
*Why do you think they've done that?
*How does that make you feel?
*Do you ever feel like hurting yourself?
#childprotectionweek2021